When you get into a relationship, would you want to be the one who loves more, or the one who is loved more? When faced with this question, most would probably choose the former, maybe because they still have a naive sense of romance (why be in a relationship if you don’t love the other person?), or maybe because they don’t want to appear too heartless. Either way, it’s hard being the one who loves your partner more, because at the end of the day, you’ll stand to lugi more than the other party, and that was what happened to this man who wanted to be known only as Faiz.
Are you in a relationship where you love harder and fiercer than your partner? If you are, you’ll probably get what he’s trying to say.
You’ll be the one always giving in
Because you love her too much to let go, you’ll tend to give in more often than is healthy in a relationship. On the other hand, she will continue to take and take, because, hey, losing you might make her sad for a day or two, but she’s fine even without you.
You’re always on the receiving end of her frustrations
You might not be the cause of her ire, but you’ve since grown used to her making snide comments or scolding you outright no matter whether its your fault or not that things are this way. Your middle name could be “punching bag” for all you know but you never hit back because, well, you love her too much.
You always find a reason to stay in the relationship
You might be sick and tired of the current state of things, but when you’re close to cutting your losses and giving up the entire relationship for good, you’ll always find some reason, no matter how little, to stay in the relationship. A small gesture might mean that she’s going to change her attitude, and the insincere apology given definitely means she is serious about changing. This time for real.
You’re always the one more excited about date night
You always appear at the venue 10 minutes beforehand, dressed up as though you’re meeting the president of some important organization while she’s the one that’s always late and give off the feel that she doesn’t really care less. Strangely, you’ve never thought that it’s because she’s not as excited about the date as you are.
You’re the only one who plans
When you’re going out on a Saturday with her, you’ll have a full itinerary ready, afraid that she might be bored. When she decides to bring you out, the attitude in which she gives is something like “take it or leave it”. And you’ll usually take it.
You’ll get taken for granted. Someday.
Because you’re so nice to her, there will come a day when you’ll be taken for granted, if you’ve not been already. After all, there’s only so much giving-without-asking-for-anything-in-return she can take before it becomes second nature for her to take something from you without giving anything in return.
You’re the only one who takes special dates seriously
To you, this date is when you guys got together. Or maybe the fourth of August is the date you guys went for your first movie together. To her, it’s just another day.
You’re forever insecure
It’s uncool for a guy to be so wishy-washy, and get jealous at the slightest provocation but you just couldn’t help it, because you feel that she leaving you is something that might just come true, if you’re not careful.
You’re tired, all the time.
What is more tiring than staying in a relationship where you feel that things wouldn’t last, and knowing that there will come a day when she decides to break things off with you. You’re waiting for the other shoe to drop, half in dread and half in relief.
You’re not the only one
There are thousands of couples out there are also in the same situation. But not all of them broke off. They’ve either learned to make do with the current status, or learn to make the other party grow to love them. Sadly, most of them fell into the former category.
Well, we wouldn’t know what’s the status of Faiz right now, but what we can say is this. It’s time to let go. Life’s too short to waste it away, and well, it doesn’t really sound like a healthy relationship to us. Not that we’re relationship gurus or anything, of course.