Quarrels between couples are common – we all disagree at some point or another. However, you need to remember these tips to make sure you save your relationship from breaking apart. These tips are also useful for guys who need to save their ass (because the ladies always seem to win no matter what).
Don’t put your partner down
This is crucial in any fight – you do not put down somebody you love. You do not call each other horrible names like “Stupid” or “Asshole” or anything. Be civilized people. Putting down someone you love tells her that you don’t actually love her.
Don’t say she is insecure
Don’t bring up each other insecurities. That is better done during deep conversations; not when you are mad at each other. Stay away from personal attacks.
Don’t fight fire with fire
If she is mad, you can’t give in and be angry too. If both are angry and you end up in a shouting match, you’ll be even more hurt and exhausted at the end of the day. One of you has to be the sane one and give in. Don’t wait for her to do it. Just give in. You can make snide remarks and guilt trip her once she’s calm down.
Calm down before saying anything.
Find yourself still not able to calm her down? Calm yourself down. When she sees that you are calm, it might make her feel like she’s overreacting – she’ll stop and talk things out. Also, you don’t want to say things you’ll never be able to take back, right?
Get to the root of the problem
Find out why you guys are arguing in the first place. Don’t bring up matters of the past. because hey, that’s the past and only ladies does that. You’re a man. Focus on what seems to be upsetting her and work on that.
Never reply unless you have thought things through
Don’t send angry texts! I’m guilty of it myself – it actually does more harm than good. You’re letting out your frustration but not in a constructive way. She’s mad at you? You take your time to be the rational one. She won’t be able to stay mad at you forever.
Give each other space
Sometimes having a timeout will do you good. Perhaps being together for so long is making one of you feel suffocated. Give each other time apart to sort out your thoughts and come back feeling ready to conquer the world together.
Don’t compare Ex-es
Major NO-NO! Don’t say “Oh but my ex didn’t mind…” or “My ex was more patient than you..” etc etc. Ex means past, so don’t even bring them up and much worse, compare your current partner to them! Because sooner or later, you’ll be telling your next partner that “my ex left me cause I told her about my ex-ex”. That’s a one-way street to breaking up, man.
Tell her you love her
At the end of the day, these ladies just want to know they are still loved despite their tempers and outbursts. Telling her you are still in love with her (you gotta mean it though cos she can tell if you don’t) will definitely save your relationship and keep it going. And it works wonder at getting her to calm down. #TrueStory
Shut up and take it like a man
Still not enough for her to end the quarrel? Seriously just keep quiet and take the brunt of the argument. Sometimes the issue is not even you; she probably had a bad day at work and you seem like the perfect avenue for her to vent. Take it like a man – she’ll stop sooner or later. Save your ass with this one.