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Here’s the killer question: In a relationship, who should love each other more?

Maybe you’ve just got into a new relationship, or you’ve been in a committed relationship for years. Sometimes, you wonder: does he love me more, or do I love him more?

The truth is, there’s never always going to be a balance. Firstly, it’s practically impossible to measure love—how do you measure something that is intangible and emotions-based? Secondly, love is like a rollercoaster—sometimes, it goes up and sometimes it goes down.

But there’s one thing that many people like to proclaim: as long as your partner loves you more, you’re victorious. You’re a winner, because he or she would do anything to your bidding.

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Well, shame on you. You’ve not won. You’ve lost.

We aren’t love gurus, but we do have common sense and have thought about it. Just think about this: let’s say you can feel that your boyfriend loves you more than you love him. Okay, so what’s going to happen? You’re going to get complacent—you won’t put in any effort to make the relationship closer, you won’t rekindle the passionate love you both have during the honeymoon period and you’ll take him for granted.

And what happens when one of them didn’t even try? They’re the ones who lose the relationship. And you think because you don’t love him that much, you won’t feel that sad?

Think again.

The person who loves you more is always trying to love you more. And for him to lose their love, he’ll simply stop trying. To put things into perspective, here’s the simple formula.

Girl loves Guy = 10
Guy loves Girl = 100

When Guy gives up, he simply needs to stop trying, and it can drop from 100 to 0 simply by stop trying. But Girl’s love for Guy is 10 even without trying—so, when there’s a breakup, here’s the formula.

Girl loves Guy = 10
Guy loves Girl = 0

Looking at this, you can see Girl to be the one crying even harder—and she’s the one who contributes to it.

So, what’s the solution? It’s impossible to be at a balance, but as long as both try to always love each other, this problem won’t occur.

So stop measuring love. Just go for it.

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